Dealing with Imposter Syndrome: Why We Should all Be More Audacious

Bless the internet

One thing I love about having access to the internet and the thoughts of others is the blessing of having certain feelings be named for you that you previously did not have the language for. Now don’t get me wrong, the internet loves to exaggerate everything and will have you thinking everybody is toxic, narcissistic, or have OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). Like no girl, your friend is trying to hold you accountable to the promises you made to yourself, they’re not being toxic for reminding you not to text that man. So while I don’t enjoy having access to everyone’s thoughts all the time, I have enjoyed being exposed to concepts I did not know about and imposter syndrome is one of them. Imposter syndrome is defined as a continual feeling of inadequacy in spite of proven competency in a particular field, topic, or space. Having imposter syndrome is being in spaces that were earned through consistent hard work, creativity, and resilience; but still internalizing self doubt or fear of not belonging.

How it’s been showing up

Recently, I have been observing my thoughts/responses to opportunities and have realized that I sometimes have imposter syndrome. When someone acknowledges my achievements, my first reaction has been to downplay my success or worse, attribute it to luck. The reality is that nothing I have happened by chance and even when I stumbled on a good thing, it was still hard work that kept me there. I realized lately that I wouldn’t even allow myself to truly celebrate my accomplishments or celebrate being one of the coolest humans to ever walk the earth (yes I said it, if you disagree go fight your mama).

A little while ago, one of my college friends reached out to me to be a panelist for an event and I immediately thought to myself “what am I going to say to these people, I haven’t done anything worth sharing”. I literally asked him for confirmation to make sure he wasn’t thinking about someone else because surely, he must be making a mistake. Meanwhile, I started a whole company during a global pandemic, hired two part time employees, and is still flourishing. In addition to that, I am a content creator, writer, editor and producer of all things Benny’s Take (my brand). I have achieved all of this while simultaneously maintaining my edges in tact and that alone, speaks to the creative genius that I am.

Is it me? Am I the drama?

It is absolutely me. I am the drama. First step is recognizing it because you cannot face demons that you ignore. In the past I would think I was being cautious by allowing myself to be better equipped and avoid taking on more than I can handle (that was part of it). The truth is, I was often just playing small and dimming my own light before it could even shine. Now that I have the language, I can catch myself mid self-doubt and reframe my perspective. The second step is to move with the audacity of white men. There are so many rooms that some of them have no business being in but you’ll find them there; mediocre yet comfortable because they believe in themselves. Let’s take our former president as an example, this man should have had a little bit of imposter syndrome but he believed in himself and as a result, others did too. The third step is to recognize that everything takes time. Even if you struggle in a new position at first, that only means that you are sharpening your skills and adding more to your tool box for greater things along the line. A lot of us women (especially black women) don’t have doors easily opened for us so when our hard work finally opens some opportunities, It takes us a second to adjust and refocus. But If Trump could be president, then we all need to dream bigger.

In conclusion

Don’t let imposter syndrome keep you from going after everything you desire. You got this and you are deserving of every door that’s open for you.

Weigh in your thoughts

How has imposter syndrome affected you? What has helped you overcome it?